Praying or Blaming

Continuing in Genesis, Isaac's son Jacob is now married to both Leah and Rachel. Leah has been given four sons, but Rachel is barren. Genesis 30:1-2:

When Rachel saw that she bore Jacob no children, she envied her sister. She said to Jacob, "Give me children, or I shall die!" Jacob’s anger was kindled against Rachel, and he said, "Am I in the place of God, who has withheld from you the fruit of the womb?"

What was interesting to me was in the study notes of my Bible. It pointed out that Jacob's mother Rebekah had also been barren, but that her husband Isaac had prayed for her:

And Isaac prayed to the LORD for his wife, because she was barren. And the LORD granted his prayer, and Rebekah his wife conceived. (Genesis 25:21)

The whole area of infertility is one fraught with heartache and pain, and I don't want to specifically even discuss the verses as it has to do with God granting or not granting children, but as it has to do with how we react to hard things.

What I noticed was the dynamic between Jacob and Rachel. First, she comes in pretty dramatically, blaming Jacob for her lack of children. Aside from the obvious, Jacob has no more control over conception than does Rachel. He reacts to her with anger and then takes his turn in blame by casting it onto God.

The contrast with what Isaac did in a similar situation was interesting. We don't know if Rebekah came to Isaac upset about not having children--I would assume she did at some point, but it isn't stated in scripture. What scripture shows us is Isaac praying for Rebekah, possibly before she even asks.

The broader application is that, so often when someone blames us for a situation, we react with anger and blame someone/something else in return, which accomplishes nothing. A better choice would be to pray about the problem, taking it to the Lord rather than reacting angrily and with accusations.

My personal application is that I can tend to feel that I need to fix whatever is wrong in a situation. If someone comes to me implying that whatever is wrong is my fault, that whips my control-freak self into a frenzy of activity characterized by bad attitude, some anger, and the tendency to blame. What I need to do is take a deep breath, pray, and then listen to the Lord.

Which is pretty much what we need to do every day, in every situation, always!