It's been over a year since I have blogged. Kids keep you busy. Marriage keeps you busy. It's true, that whole thing in the Bible about how singleness gives opportunity for a more focused walk with the Lord (how I hated being reminded of that when I was single).
I came back to my blog to re-read the story of how our son came to us. In the entry, I had written, "Then one phone called changed everything."
Friday, we were leaving the airport returning home from a family vacation. I was in the backseat with the toddler, and Paul was in front chatting with the friend who had picked us up. "Hi. . . Did you know that Z's birth mom was expecting another baby? The baby was born yesterday, a little girl. We called you to see if you would take placement of the baby?" Without even blinking (or asking Paul), I said, "Yes." "You can come get her today or tomorrow, I'll let you know."
One phone call, and now we are, for the time being at least, a family of four.
Once again, the joy we have at receiving a baby into our home is tempered with sadness for the birth parents who have already lost one child and may lose another, and for the brokenness in this world that leads to the trauma of separating babies from mamas. In our case, as in so many, there are no quick fixes. Our heart is for safety and stability for both Z and S. God has also, however, given us hearts that desire healing and wholeness for the birth parents, and a desire for connection with them.
Singleness had its blessings of more time to reflect, connect with the Lord, journal, and blog. Family life has its blessings of character refinement, connecting to the Lord with someone else, and pursuing God and His will with a partner. Both of those stations in life require faith and trust.
We opened our hearts and home to both Z and S knowing they might not stay. We mentally try to stay aware of the risk, but these children deserve to be in a home where they are loved unreservedly. Jesus will heal our hearts if we don't stay a family of four. We trust that our work of building attachment, trust, and love will make Z and S healthy, happy people wherever and whenever they must leave us. That desire doesn't make us special. It just makes us parents. All of our children will eventually leave, and they don't really belong to us in the first place.
We have been praying for a sibling for Z, whose adoption is in process, for months. For now, that prayer is answered. One phone call, again, changed everything.
